Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

i have a sister who is 15 years. we live in Canada. she started wearing Hejap( she was 13 at that time)..BUT SHE WANTS TO TAKE IT OFF,,,,IMAGINE>>now she is in hgith school, and she is going with the wrong group. I am with her in the same school, but I am 3 years older than her....even bad students in my grade warned me...they told me that my sister is going in the wrong direction and she might even lose her virginity.....I don`t know how come she changed that much...My mother is so close to both of us and my father is our best friend...basically we have the best parents...we sleep under the same roof and we are brought grown up together...some times I wonder why did that happen to my parents, they don`t deserve that, than I ASTAkhfor ALLA and ask for forgiveness. she called the police once and asked them to leave our family because we don`t give her freedom....BUT they didn`t take her....and my parents tried to take to her and say that boy friend and taking off hejap is haram....we even got Iqraa channel just to make her better....now I found out that she is hanging out with a really bad guy (drug dealer) and I don`t know if I have to tell my parents or should I beat her up....I am scared that something would happen to my parents and don`t want to cause them and pain and she will also say that I am snitch and she won`t trust me ever again....please help me what should I do??? should I kill her and take the pain away form my parents...or should I just pray?????please help

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Answer:

Discipline sister

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Dear and beloved brother in Islam, it would only be an extension of your love and your genuine well-wishing for your sister that you fear for her future and strive your utmost to politely but firmly guide her to fear Allah and His Day of Accounting, and warn her of the consequences which her daring transgression of Allah’s Prescribed Boundaries might bring upon her.  If after your very best efforts your sister does not heed your good caution, and you genuinely intend good for your sister, there is absolutely no harm in you informing your parents so that they as her guardians may fulfill their duty and stop her from falling further into sin and transgression.

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 3.733         Narrated by Abdullah bin Umar

That he heard Allah's Messenger (saws) saying, "Everyone of you is a guardian and is responsible for those in his care; the ruler is a guardian and is responsible for his subjects; the man is a guardian in his family and responsible for his charges; a woman is a guardian of her husband's house and responsible for her charges; and the servant is a guardian of his master's property and is responsible for his charge; so everyone of you is a guardian and responsible for those under his care."

You as the brother are obviously not responsible for the deeds of your sister when her parents are still alive; but it would be an extension of your sincere love and genuine well-wishing for your sister that you at least make sincere efforts to stop your sister falling further into transgression and sin.  The final responsibility of striving to stop your sister from sinking deeper into transgression would lie foremost upon your sister herself and also upon her parents/guardians.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone.  Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan