Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

I recently got married. I would like to know about physical relationships between a husband and wife. Is Ghusl required ONLY after sexual intercourse? What about discharges that are due to excitement, which are not followed by sex? If I am feeling a wetness when my husband fondles with my body or kisses me, does that wetness require purification though a ghusl or is washing the private parts enough? Moreover, by sexual intercourse, do we mean just the act or does it include having an orgasm, so if the woman does not have an orgasm during the intercours, she is pure?

Please also provide me with the aayat that is required to be recited during intercourse when one wants to pray for the baby that can be potentially formed from the intercourse.Thanking you in anticipation.

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Ghusl after intercourse

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Your Question: ….I recently got married. I would like to know about physical relationships between a husband and wife.

Abu Dhar al-Ghafari reported: ‘The Messenger of Allah (saws) said: “There is a reward for you [even] in sex with your wife."’ The companions asked: ‘O Messenger of Allah (saws) is there a reward if one satisfies his passion?" He (saws) said: "Do you know that if he satisfies it unlawfully he has taken a sin upon himself?  Likewise, if he satisfies it lawfully, he is rewarded."

Related by Ahmad and Muslim.

Your Questions: ….Is Ghusl required ONLY after sexual intercourse? What about discharges that are due to excitement, which are not followed by sex? If I am feeling a wetness when my husband fondles with my body or kisses me, does that wetness require purification though a ghusl or is washing the private parts enough? Moreover, by sexual intercourse, do we mean just the act or does it include having an orgasm, so if the woman does not have an orgasm during the intercours, she is pure?

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chatper 5 Surah Maidah verse 6 (part):

…..If ye are in a state of ‘ceremonial impurity’ bathe your whole body.

The acts which constitute ‘ceremonial impurity’ and make the ‘ghusl’ obligatory before one can offer their prayers are:

1. Full sexual intercourse
2. Full release of sexual emission (mani).
3. If the male private organ (so much so as even) touches the female private organ.
4. Post menstruation (for women).

Your Question: …..What about discharges that are due to excitement, which are not followed by sex?

Other than urine, there are basically three types of discharges that are released from one’s private organs:

1. Wadi (a thick white secretion immediately after uniration by some people)
2. Madhi (a sort of slow release of lubricant just prior to a full sexual discharge)
3. Mani (a full sexual discharge)

Fiqh-us-Sunnah Fiqh 1.10

Wadi is a thick white secretion discharged (by some people) after urination. It is considered impure.  Aishah said, " Wadi comes out after urination. The person should wash the private parts and perform ablution.  It is not necessary to perform ghusl. This is related by Ibn al-Mundhir.  Ibn 'Abbas related that "mani” (ejaculation or full sexual discharge) requires ghusl.  As for “madhi” (prostatic fluid or initial sexual discharge) and ‘wadi’ they require a complete purification."  This is related by al-Athram.  Al-Baihaqi has it with the wording, "Concerning ‘madhi’ and ‘wadi’, he said, 'Wash your sexual organs and perform the same type of ablution as you perform for prayer."'

If only ‘Wadi’ or ‘Madhi’ is released, one does not require a ‘ghusl’ or full bath to purify oneself; one must wash their private parts and the part of their clothes or body where the ‘wadi’ or ‘madhi’ has touched, do the ‘wudu’, and one would be able to make themselves available for prayer.

But when the ‘Mani’ or a full sexual discharge is released, it would become obligatory for the person to perform a ‘ghusl’ or full bath to purify oneself before making oneself available for prayer.

Your Question: ….If I am feeling a wetness when my husband fondles with my body or kisses me, does that wetness require purification though a ghusl or is washing the private parts enough?

The lubricant or wetness which is released prior to sexual intercourse is known as ‘madhi’; and if only the ‘madhi’ is released, one need not perform a full bath or ghusl….washing of the private parts or the parts of the body or clothes where the ‘madhi’ has touched would suffice for purification.

Your Question: ….Moreover, by sexual intercourse, do we mean just the act or does it include having an orgasm, so if the woman does not have an orgasm during the intercours, she is pure?
The acts which constitute ‘ceremonial impurity’ and make the ‘ghusl’ obligatory before one can offer their prayers are:

• Full sexual intercourse
• Full release of sexual emission (mani).
• If the male private organ (so much so as even) touches the female private organ.

If the male private organ has so much so as even touched the female private organ; or if the male private organ has entered the female private organ; or if one has experienced a full sexual discharge (mani)…..one would be in the state of ‘ceremonial’ impurity and one must perform a full bath of purification or ‘ghusl’ before one make themselves available for prayer.

Your Question: …Please also provide me with the aayat that is required to be recited during intercourse when one wants to pray for the baby that can be potentially formed from the intercourse.
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 4.493         Narrated by Ibn Abbas

The Prophet (saws) said, "If anyone of you, when having sexual relation with his wife, says: 'Bismillah.  Allah humma jannib nas-Shaytaan wa jannib nas-Shaytaana feema razaktana’ (In the name of Allah. O Allah! Protect us from the Shaytaan and prevent the Shaytaan from approaching our offspring You (may) bestow upon us) and if he begets a child (as a result of that relation) Shaytaan will not (be able to) harm it."

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone.  Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan